My ingredients for a healthy relationship…
- A relationship built on the foundation of a solid friendship: A relationship without a strong friendship will never work. In order to have a true partnership, there must be a friendship between two individuals. A friendship in which you are there for the other person, no matter what. You will be there to wipe their tears, to hold their hand, to comfort them, to laugh with them over nonsense and to give them advice when they need it. A relationship takes great work on both parts. We would do anything for our friends; especially for the man/woman that we love.
- Passion for one another & a love for something of your own: We can find passion in many aspects of our lives. Whether it be in our careers, for a certain hobby that we love, our family and passion for the man/woman whom is the love of our life. When there is no passion, the drive for an incredible love flames out. Love is an extraordinary gift. Passion propels you to do the wildest things in your life. When you find your soul mate, passion is not only what you share in the bedroom, but in all areas of your loving relationship. Passion dives much deeper to the core of both individuals. Without passion, life and love just aren’t the same.
- Trust, loyalty & devotion to one other: Some may say that there is more than one person for each of us–I greatly disagree. The moment we find the person we are meant to spend the rest of our lives with, we innately know. As a woman who knows what she wants from love and life, even the mere thought of my love being dishonest scares me senseless. When you have someone so precious, whom you love with all your being, why would you do something to hurt them? Falling in love is a true gift and an even greater gift is loving another being with your whole self–truly devoted to another person.
- Sharing a love for a certain activity, hobby, etc. together: I adore dancing. Since I was a little girl, I have been dancing. From ballet, tap, jazz, hip-hop, Israeli and now Latin. I find a man who dances, to be one of the sexiest things in this world. My love and I have been taking Latin dance lessons (salsa, bachata & merengue) for about a year now and we absolutely love it. Any chance we get, we dance! Not only are we doing something that we both immensely enjoy, but at the same time we are learning new moves, styles and having a great time! Whatever activity brings you and your sweetheart happiness is worth it. Whether it’s traveling, cooking, outdoor adventures, decorating, or all of the above! If you two love to dance, I recommend taking lessons (group or private). Soon we are going to take beginner lessons in Argentine Tango, then Swing…& we can’t wait! When you have passion the list of things to do together grows.
- Respecting one another’s space: As much as I love being with my sweetie pie, I also appreciate my along time and my space–and I respect his. You don’t have to be attached to the hip 24/7 guys! You’re allowed to do your own thing and so is your partner. If you don’t share every activity together, thats normal. Ladies, your man is allowed to have a night with his buddies–there’s nothing wrong with that. Same with having a night with just the girls. When you cross those boundaries of having alone time, you step into very deep, cold, shark infested waters! I love you sweetheart (if you’re reading this) but I also love being able to let loose with the girls! Right ladies?
- Being open minded about trying new things (exotic foods, travel, ect.): Life is about trying to see and experience as much as your can in the short time we have on this earth. Why limit yourself? You may look at something initially and think that you can’t do it, but if you break it down, it is possible. Maybe you and your love want to take on rock climbing. Tackle it this way: learn to climb indoors first, then if you are ready for the real thing, know that you have each other. Don’t be overwhelmed. Life is about learning and trying. You may fail 50 times before you get it right–but at least you know that you never gave up. Thats how a relationship works. You work at it together–a joint effort. In the process, you get to see what you both enjoy and who knows, you just might surprise yourselves.
- Listening to what your partner has to say & communicating: You both are two separate individuals and have your own thoughts, ideas, opinions and feelings. I can promise you this, there will be many times when you feel strongly about something and you both don’t agree with each other at all. There is nothing wrong with having your own views on things, as long as you hear the other person out. You’re a team, listen to the other person. You may learn something. When something is wrong or bothering you, it’s best to just get it out and tell the other person. Holding it in just makes you feel angry and your lovie isn’t a mind reader. No one is going to have the patience to play the guessing game when something is making you upset. Let the other person know what’s going on so you two can talk about it and get it resolved. There’s no use in holding a grudge. Otherwise you’re left with two frustrated people. Talk about it and work on fixing the issue/problem together.
- Making an effort to surprise each other (the little things mean the most): For way too long I didn’t understand how it felt to be treated with love and respect by a wonderful man–now I know and I adore him endlessly. On the night of my 24th birthday, my love gave me a super spectacular surprise….he flew in my best friend whom lives in California!! Now, as I said, the little things mean the most.. but this was grand! No one has every done something like this for me–it was amazing and I am so grateful for what he did 🙂 Love isn’t about topping the other person, but doing something that will put a smile on the other persons face. Small gestures of love and appreciation. I’m not saying you need to spend a fortune. Seeing your love surprised is wonderful. Although I wasn’t able to fly over Arsenal ( his all time favorite futbol team) I surprised him by making his favorite cake! It may be small, but it was made with love, for my love.
- Wanting the other to succeed: Everyday I am so grateful for the man I am with and I fall more and more in love with him. One of the first things he told me was how he wants me to be successful in life. When both individuals in the relationship are successful in their careers and professional life they share that success with each other. Everyday at work won’t be a breeze, and of course there will be stressful days. But, having someone who genuinely wants to see you succeed and do incredible things in your life is extremely important. I wish him only greatness and success as well. There hasn’t been a moment when he hasn’t pushed me to do more for myself. Challenge each other and push one another to excel and do great things. You’ll be thankful in the end.
- Spending time with friends & family: As madly as you two may be in love with each other, don’t forget about your friends! I’m not saying that every moment together should be spent with others–otherwise you have another problem on your hands. However, it is important to have a life where you around friends and family whom you love and care about and vis versa. Don’t coop yourselves in the house, lock the door and throw out the key! There needs to be a healthy of balance of alone time, where you grow together, as well as time with friends and family. Sharing your love for one another with those closest to you if what it is all about. There’s plenty of time of locking up the door and getting lost inside with each other!
- Being silly! Most importantly! 🙂 Remember that being in love is about having fun too. There’s nothing wrong with being childish and silly together–it’s perfectly healthy!